Sold: The Floored Genius One

The Floored Genius One is a stunning looking and sounding Jookified Jazzmaster that is truly cool in every way.

Based on Fender’s finest, a swamp ash body has been stained and waxed, back and sides, before being abused, scratched, scraped and generally bothered beyond a decent point.

The neck is a good old school handful with a low buzz-free action and a beautiful smooth finish.

The classic Jazzmaster tremolo and Mustang Bridge solve the old traditional problems.

Sounds come via specially wound Jazzmaster pickups, made by Marc Ransley at Mojo Pickups, they along with the top notch Mojo Jazzmaster loom drags every possible tone out of the guitar with ease.

All in all, this is a stunning looking guitar, with bags of tone and a beautiful feel. What else could you possibly want?



*


To be clear, The Floored Genius One is an utterly unique guitar, and there will never, ever, be another made. It is signed and numbered, entirely hand built and finished cooler than a slo-mo run across the pebbled beach at Portishead. There will genuinely never be another guitar like this and past experience suggests that it won’t be around for long.

*** SOLD ****

Technical Stuff:

Type: Norma’s Natural Guitar

Electrics: Mojo Pickups Jazzmaster pickups, Jazzmaster wiring loom

Guitar Type: Fender Jazzmaster

Construction: Swamp Ash body, Maple/Rosewood neck

Strings:     Nickel 11s

Output: ¼” Guitar Lead

Controls: Volume, Tone, 3-way-switch, Rhythm Circuit

Special Stuff: Certificate of Authenticity, Builder Signed and Numbered, All Wrapped with our Trademark Jooky Wrapping.

Serial Number: JGE#30

Introducing: The Floored Genius One

Well, twice in one week is an unexpected pleasure, but I am pleased to be introducing you to the lovely, the slightly careworn, the Elvis Costello inspired, The Floored Genius One, a lovely lump of swamp ash Jazzmasterness.

And man it sings.

From the top it is a swamp ash bodied Jazzmaster.

Maple and rosewood neck (22 frets, and medium fretted, 9.5" radius, so not exactly vintage)

The body has been stained a dark walnut/oak hybrid and is unevenly worn and distressed, scratched, scraped and vaguely battered before receiving a hard wax oil finish that looks particularly groovy and itself has been patchily worn. Lovely.

Tuners are Wilkinson, with a Jazzmaster tremolo, Mustang bridge for goodly tunefilledness.

Pickups are a pair of Mojo Pickups' exquisite Jazzmaster pups, and a full Mojo wiring loom (CTS pots, Switchcraft switch, cloth covered wire, PIO caps) drags every iota of tone from the thing.

And sounds-wise, well it sounds like an excellent Jazzmaster, vibrant, dark and generally evil like an empire. If twangs your thang, Dick Dale would gush, if noise gets added in there, it can make you weep like a chutchy bunnie.

And all-in-all, I have to say I am really rather chuffed. I wasn't trying to replicate Elvis Costello's guitar, but I think I captured the vibe, and more importantly, I wanted that old wood feel about the body, and it certainly gets there on that score.

So there we are, The Floored Genius One, uber cool and not a little funky of the groove. Like blood and chocolate. Nice..

La la laaaa

Two Strings On My Jooky

Well, it seems I still have some work to do in getting The Pearly Dewdrop One fettled. There are a couple of strings on now and the alignment is right, and even in it's unfinished state it sounds and feels stunning. Light as a feathery thing too, which is good, unless it's a buzzard or Slerk or something.

Today and some of tomorrow are probably going to prove to be my last real chance so I need to get my finger out and get a shift on with it, if I'm going to be playing Band Aid this Xmas. I wear one every Xmas, of course, and most of the rest of the year too. But strumming, well, it's kinda different. Two strings on my Jooky just seems never enough.

All of which has made me all the keener to get The Frou Frou Fox One started. I'm going for a clunky big tailpiece on this one in the end, because I can, and have a nice old Gibson P90 Dogear from a Junior for the noisnikking so all in all it should be pretty cool. I just want to get Pearl done first - learn the lessons and all that.

But the Frou Frau, I've gone around the houses a bit on that one in terms of what the finish will be, but I'm coming to the conclusion that maybe acrylic paint and corroded copper together could be fun. Only on the top mind, the back is going to be stained, as with Pearl.

I am also vaguely hoping that my errant tremolo will arrive for The Floored Genius One, though I have also ordered one locally (the other is coming from the US of A) which will hit the spot too. I need them here tomorrow at the latest either way, and I can't say hope is springing even momentarily. Everything else is done though with that baby, so it is just down to the thumbing of the twiddles and all that.

I have to say, I am already planning the next Jazzmaster as I want to do one in gold leaf (after seeing the new re-issues in Shoreline Gold), but I really can't add to the to-do list for a while, so I'll say no more. Until tomorrow, I expect.

sLa la laaaa

What's In The Post, Today?

Esquires are Coool

Well, back to the waiting-for-parts mantra, but I always love it when a big box comes from Marc at Mojo Pickups, and this morning such a thing arrived, and yes, I loved it.

I spend a lot of time alone.

First up was the pickups and wiring loom for The Floored Genius One, which I managed to put in without breaking, which is always a bonus. The nice thing about getting the loom and the pickups together for a Jazzmaster is of course that they don't require any soldering as the chap has already done it all - so a few screws and we're there.

What I'm less happy about is that I'm still awaiting the trem and bridge, but once they come it will be clover I tell you, clover.

Jazzmasters are Cooool

Also in the box, was the Hot Broadcaster pickup and super cool Esquire wiring loom for The Old No. 7 One, which when the control plate arrives (hopefully tomorrow) I'll be able to install and hit with a tuning fork to hear it twanging, which is pretty darn cool.

This is officially the first time we've got some of Crazyparts' 'TVT - True Vintage Taper CTS'  pots in one of our guitars, which are meant to be the best-pots-in-the-world-ever, so there. I have high hopes, nerd fans, it has to be said.

Jazzmaster Looms Are Coooool

Other than that, The Old No.7 One's body is all dry and waxed now and looking suitably like it is ancient and just hanging in there. The neck is ordered, though that will take a few weeks, so in between I get to play with some metalwork which I'm looking forward to. They do the ER up so nicely at Xmas.

Other than that, the body insert things arrived from Faber in Germany, which means that I can finally install the uber cool bridge on The Pearly Dewdrop One and get that fettled.

That may be my Xmas pressie to meself if I can get away with it, unless The Floored Genius One proves to be.

Unless I sell them of course,
I guess.

Right, now to find an old Jack Daniels sign or three to chop up...lovely.

La la laaaa

Floored For The Thirty-Third Time

Well, I'm per-leased to say that The Floored Genius One is now suitably stained and hard waxed and looking rather groovy . I had a couple of goes at mixing my own stain (why does that sound so odd?) and got where I wanted to be in the end, and best of all no freckles, which is a result.

So that is cool McFrosty methinks.

As for my little Teardrop, Pearl, I never actually did any more on that, but some super cool knobs showed up - NOS Hofner ones - which I think will set it of a treat. Lovely. Can't wait to finish this.

As for my comic frenzy, well it never happened today, but hopefully I will develop a stronger will tomorrow. Well, you never know.

As for those two Tele bodies, I've still not decided what to be doing with them yet and I have had another brainstorm that looks like it might be a runner, so more on that anon too.

I am sooo verily mysterious-like, and I have a pair of shiny knobs, and what boy wouldn't be smug about that?

La la laaaa

Flooring Genius

Well, things are coming together nicely with the Pearly Dewdrop One, though it is taking forever to dry - guess it's getting cold, bbrrrrr.

Also, it is nice to see that The Tickled Pink One is picking up some space in the papers and I am loving the rejiggled The Confused One all over again. I am definitely putting a Shorty bridge on Pearl, as I've been quite impressed with the difference between that and a Strat hardtail tone-wise.

Other than that, the 'To Do' list is dancing along a rainbow into the distance, and I clearly should get my finger out and start doing something about all those lovely ideas. I mean, I've got teardrops, a semi Jazzmaster, a la Cab, a bass of some sort, a Captain America smothered Strat and gord knows what else to sort out, which means I am above capacity and looking well into the new year before I catch up again..

So obviously, yesterday I snaffled myself a nice Jazzmaster body and a neck, asked Marcy Mojo to do me some pickups and a loom, and started on something new again.

At least in my head.

Silly though it sounds, but it is because I have a nice red tortie 'plate ready to go, and it would seem a shame to waste it

Plus, I think I really should make meself a proper Jazzmaster as I have serious pangs and self loathing over the departure down under of The Fallen One. I also still hanker for an Elvis Costello one, and this is probably as close as i'll get, so it had better be known as The Floored Genius One, as I have meant to use that name a few times before and it has never came together. It had to happen sooner or later, let's face it, and not a bit of parquet in sight.

La la laaa

I Live for the Burn and the Sting of Pleasure

The Porn Shop One
Seen Later Yesterday

Well, I was going to talk about The Porn Shop One, but it has turned into a painfilled subject now, and I can't quite bring myself to broach it. Suffice to say that a drawing board may be returned to and I might need to see about a new body.

But there we are, what can you do about kids with hacksaw blades and too many home improvement programmes on Sky?

I blame the parents and of course it is the school holidays and I was too busy playing Paranoid.

On the sunny side of the street, I'm all rather chuffed with myself. The Les Paul Special I was talking about has yet to enter the palace of Jooky delightedness, but I've already managed to acquire a couple of rather dishy Catswhisker P90 Soapbars for it. I've also got some snotty Kluson tuners, a nice ABR/ToM bridge combo, which is all rather handy too.  Fotos to follow when I have something to fotograph.

As to my plans, well it will arrive in the usual cherry colour, but I have a yen to give it a fully agricultural finish. Things have been getting a bit bright and breezy recently and it is time to revert to my usual scenes of degradation and destruction. The Wasteland One then, should be just that. Actually, maybe I shouldn't mention destruction, it is a saw point at the mo.

As for The Floored Genius One yesterday, well, it never got too far as it happens as my little Orpheum SG took advantage of my every spare moment in rude and often downright dirty ways. The minxetta.

Today though, assuming the postie turns up before bedtime, I'm hoping to have the remaining parts for The Elmer One, so that could jump back to the top of the shop.

All of which leaves me - well, where?

I'm not really sure.

Busy in a non-specific way, I guess.

No More Wussiness - Part 73.xii.W

Well, here we go again. I'm still awaiting a soldering iron - why do I keep relying on ebay??? - so The Old Burny One can't be meaningfully touched, and everything else is limbo-ified unless the postie delivers. Sounds like another blow-out of a Jooky day.

On the plus side, it means I'm going to stop being a wuss and get my head around The Floored Genius One.

For those of you have given up hope of keeping track of my guitar projects, this is a parquet flooring covered Telecaster body that I picked-up a while ago.

I already have a nice neck for it, and a lovely Catswhisker handwound bridge pickup which is a tad warmer than traditional - overwound, that's the word I was trying to remember - so it should be a bit of a noisy one.

It is destined to have a blank scratchplate, being a single pickup type of thing, but the wiring will be simplistic, volume and tone knobs and that be it. I'm going for locking tuners on this along with a more modern six saddle bridge and that is about the tale to be tolden.

So what is the problem?

Well, firstly the neck pocket has been cut too small, and as there isn't a lot of wood to play with I think I'm going to be reducing the neck width by a couple or three mm rather than widening the socket. Not the end of the world but a pain, in truth.

Other than that, it hasn't been drilled for the neck bolts, the pots, the bridge or for the general wiring. This I have to do, but it leaves me a bit cold and to be honest I've bottled it so far as, well, I'm a wuss.

Plus my handraulic drill is cool, but I can't find any of the drill bits.

Which is my self-face-saving excuse, of course.

All of which doesn't seem a lot on paper or screen, but has built itself mountainous in my little mind, and I bottle it. Simple as that

But not today. For today I drill and be damned and there we are.

I still haven't got a clue what parquet covering will do to the guitars tone, and to be honest I'm clueless as to what the wood under the floorboards is anyway, but you have to take chances sometimes, don't you?

Something Genius, Something Holy

The Floored Genius One

Well, so much for soldering yesterday - I started, then got distracted and then, well, that was that really. I was having a bit of a clear out in truth and got rid of a hard case, some pedals and other bobbins-n-bits.

However, as I type this I am waiting for the iron to once more warm up, and then shall be in full-on burning finger mode, it is going to be good.

I am absolutely loving the look of The Old Burny one, and it is giving me a bit of a dilemma. On one side I have The Golden Shower One, and on the other this. And I can't for the life of me decide which one to keep. The Old Burny One  will no doubt be the much better guitar (and saying that is like admitting you prefer one of your kids), but I do so love a Golden Shower.

Decisions...still, no real rush.

One thing I forgot the other day, when I was saying I had nowt else lined-up, was of course The Floored Genius One. This is another Tele, but is one with a twist, the top is, or looks like, parquet flooring. Which I have to say stands out from the crowd somewhat. I've been thinking about what to do with it for ages, but in the end have gone for an oiled finish as I'm not sure that fabric, leaf or gloopy metal paints will really improve on the fact that well, it is made from somebody's floor. You can't really get much more Jooky than that, lets face it.

Anyway, I had got myself organised to sort out a neck - a nice rosewood boarded maple jobbie, and I'm going to break a habit of a lifetime and put two Tele pickups in it once I sort some out. For now though I've just been giving it a going over with some Danish Oil and will probably do a few more coats and then wax finish it. Unless I change my mind and decide to fill the groove with something, err, groovy.

Thinking about it, it might be a good one to try one of The Creamery's Tele Bridge shaped P90s in, maybe with a nice neck pickup. It's sounding good already.

Hmm, just noticed I need to do some hole-making, that slows me down normally. Ah well, one more for the Coming Soon list then, The Floored Genius One...La la & a laaa

***

While writing this, I just received a rather lovely Electro Harmonix Holy Stain pedal from a chap in a van. I must admit I've never got on with Multi-fx, all those patches and memory slots to remember, far too much hassle and confusion. But this one does a lot less and has proper knobs and footswitches. It only has a couple of reverbs, a tremolo, some sort of phasey chorus modulation thing and some fuzz, but then I'm quite a simple kinda guy, so it looks great. The soldering might become tomorrow now...

.