WIP: The Drip Dry One

OK, I admit it. it all got a bit 'on top' last week, and not a lot seemed to go right. In a vague attempt to get myself back from the brink, as it were, I decided yesterday to take the quite radical step on sticking to one guitar until it is complete.

Obviously, not my normal thing, but there we are.

So I re-wired the Drip Dry One.
And then did it again.
And again.

Not because it was silent, no. More because it wouldn't shut up, and whatever I did, both pickups were on and that was that.
I still don't know why.
Anywaysup, I got all technical with the multimeter and it seemed as though the switch was knackered, so I chucked my toys and did something else.

Today then, despite the allure of other radical beauty, I went and bought a new switch and fitted it and if it didn't quite work first time, it was soon doing the bizz.

Happy chap.

So after that I did a bit of work on the neck - it was baked-in-grubby, but now is clean and oiled lovely like. And I even fitted it....

In fact it is done apart from that I have run out of time before I fitted some strings.

But tomorrow, I will fit strings, not start something else.
And once this one is finished, as I now know deep down and inside you'll be glad to her, it will - I will then think about something else.

I won't even think about thinking about what it might be right now.

The End.

~~~~~~~~~~~ Interlude ~~~~~~~~~~~

Obviously, something did pop up to detract me, I've snaffled a lovely looking Tele body and neck, and some Heavy Rock monstrocity, but more about them later..

~~~~~~~~~~~ Musical Interlude ~~~~~~~~~~~

Incidentally, and not at all linked to any of the above chaos, but I am loving to read  Erin Bennett's Blog right now, and listening to the various wicked songs she has on there and Facebook etc.

You can see what I mean HERE

No she doesn't play a Jooky, but I can like her anyway.

Drip Dribbling Away

Well, I had such plans, such guitar finalising plans...and then we're back into sick-kid-weekend mode, and soldering goes out of the window.

You see, I think I sussed the problem with The Old Burny One after getting out the multimeter and it seems one of the pots is dead, no doubt due to a bit of over-enthusiastic soldering on my part. I had a spare or twelve, so that was fine, but now...looks like Monday again.

I did however get the missing bridge for The Drip Dry One from the clutches of the local Posty, so between cold poultices and sugary tea, Calpol and the mopping of fevered brows I'm aiming to at least get that somewhere close to finished today. Given the odd few stolen moments. Or over the weekend at least.

I have taken so long on this one, that I'd forgotten how beautiful the mahogany body is. but looking at it now, it proper shimmers. The rust looks amazing too, I'm really rather chuffed and glad that I showed more than my usual levels of restraint. It happens rarely enough, let's face it.

As I said, I've gone for a Wilkinson bridge/trem with a solid steel block as they give the guitars zingy sustain a bit of a leg up. Pickupwise it is an old favourite an IronGear Alchemist 90 - P90 - at the neck, and a genuine '70s DiMarzio Super Distortion at the bridge. I've actually used a bridge P90 at the neck to even things up a bit.

Other than that it is a nice big-of-headstock Strat neck, rosewood 'board, Kluson tuners and a lot of attitude.

Like I said the other day, I think this will be my last Strat for a while, and it is going to be quite the rocker, so it is.

But I'm babbling..time to put the chukkie soup on the hob.

When Will It All Go Right?

Well, slight change of plan in that I'm still courier-a-waiting, and so never made it to town to get the shiny new bridge for The Drip Dry One, so I rewired it and that is that.

Instead of finishing that baby I dug deep and faced the pain that is The Old Burny One.

Now I thought I'd found the problem with this. I replaced the switch I'd managed to break, and I swapped the wires I'd manage to misplace...and things were looking good, but no banana.

So, at the moment I've got the neck pickup working but the bridge and middle positions of the old flicky switch are doornail dead. And man have I checked my wiring, rewired all sorts of bobbins, but nada, naff-all and zilch.

So is it a knackered pot?

Another dodgy switch?

Is my old Gibson 'Original' past it's sell by date?

I really don't know.

Wondering whether to cover up the bridge pickup and call it a Jr?

Nah, it'll never look right and will only bug me.

~~~~~~~~Musical Interlude ~~~~~~~~

Well, the courier arrived - wonder where that will end up?
But too late in the day for me to get to the Post Office, and I'm out of soldering time as far as the Old Burny One goes.

So, tomorrow, it will have to be tomorrow now won't it.

*Deep breaths *

Yours, beautifully bugged...

Talking The Walk

Time to get me act together and stop playing with the kids

Well, like I was saying yesterday - The Porn Shop One is bugging me. Don't get me wrong it is probably one of the best things to come out of Jookyland, but the neck is well and truly bent. More corkscrew than banana. More Twister than Fab.

Which is a downer.

But I have a new neck, so apart from finishing it to match, it shouldn't be a major issue.

Or so I thought until I conspired with myself to make it worse, as when I tried to take it off I somehow sheared it (if that is the right word for the top coming off of a screw and leaving the rest behind) which means I can't actually get the neck off at all. And when I do, there will still be a lump of metal sticking out.

On the plus side I did manage to remove most of the melted wiring mess from under the scratchplate, but it seems like a small mercy right now.

*sigh*

But that is for another day when my brain is clearer.

Today then, I have decided to finish up The Drip Dry One. I had wired this, but decided to do it differently and am going to re-do it from scratch. There is a good reason for this, but it escapes me right now.

Other than that I had already sorted out the tuners and the replacement - correct of size - bridge is awaiting me at the Post Office, Super Sustaining Steel Block and all, so I need to pick that up if my courier vigil ever ends.

From there, all that's left is for me to put a new nut on and get some strings in place and we should be there. Hopefully I'll be able to introduce you tomorrow. Or perhaps the day after the next one, or three after that.

Getting around to doing stuff is the tricky part, as The Bye Bye Buy One and The Off Key One are currently vying for my favours at the moment. I do love the Hot Slag in the BBBO, and yet Senor Jess' P90 is just sex-on-a-sticky-stick, so I'm spoiled somewhat. And you can't play with one without t'other getting jealous, you know what kids are like.

But enough talking about it...

A Kick Up the '80s

Well, having been in a girly strop for the last couple of days, I figured I should get my bloodied finger out and do something useful.

This morning then I have been jumping around playing Europe and Bon Jovi, Def Leppard and Whitesnake high-density, hour long solos whilst dressed in Spandex, Lycra, Diamante and  leg warmers, modelling a poodly permed wig and shouting 'Greed is Good', and 'Pass the Bolly, old chap'.

Yes, it's the Tory party conference at the moment, but it wasn't because of The Maggie T Memorial Trust meeting today, or because Edwina Currie is looking like a TV dinner and dancing her way around the place.

No.

It is because I finally finished The Bye Bye Buy One, complete with all it's period pointyness.

And mucho fun it is too.

Not that it is verily fizzy sounding anymore, as it has a Kent Armstrong Lippy pickup at the neck and an IronGear Hot Slag at the bridge, which are rather lovely sounding, but it is surprisingly nice to play,. (I have to admit it is the first time I've dared touch such a pointy thing as this old 80s Charvette, but there we are.)

As I said before, this has already been homed before I even finish it and is destined to accompany The Porn Shop One, which has been similarly spoken for, as a couple of tattered looking swells.

Assuming I ever manage to scrape the burnt innards out of the rustified Telemaster, that is. Or indeed do something about the neck which I managed to leave in the October sun and now is somewhat kinky. I might have to replace that if the cold poultice and piles of encyclopedias approach doesn't pay off.

In fact, being honest, I'm rather down about my Porny friend at the moment, all told. It started so well and then disaster after disaster, but there we are. A period of reflection should sort it out.

But then I thought that when Blair got in...

Hmmm. I was happy when I started and now I've depressed meself.

Maybe I'll go play Crazy Nights again...

Vapourware Am We

Well, as I've just about got to the end of my body mountain, and whilst my 'Coming Soon list still needs a bit of attention, I've been thinking about what comes next.

Firstly, I'm going to try and do (like so many times before) one guitar at a time.

OK, maybe two, but not seven, OK?

The reason for this is because I lose track otherwise and forget what it was I got excited about in the first place, which is kinda daft.

I'm also going to aim to do some certain types of guitars, which have been on the Wish List a while too long.

It kinda became a bit easy to do yet more Strats, the path of resistance minor, fun though they are, which is why I'm not intending to do any more for a while.

So anyway, there are a few guitars that are really just vapourware at the moment, and I guess I should expend a wee bit of energy sorting them out once and for all.

I figured if I listed them here, at least I might remember them tomorrow when I see somebody flogging a bunch of Strats and a roll of paisley fabric.

So, from the top, my current Wish List goes something like this:

1. A La Cabronita. As I said the other day, this is verily on the cards, which is a good thing, and it has already made the coming soon list as The Joe Le Taxi One, too, I notice. Can't think how that happened.

2. An Explorer-esque thing: I know I did The Crowley One, which was rather cool, but I fancy doing another one. And that is good enough for me.

3. Something Firebird-like: Again, I had a near miss on this and it is bugging me, so it's time will come.

4. A Teardrop shaped one. I am determined to put a Strattish neck on a Vox Teardrop shaped body. Preferably with a couple of P90 soapbars, and maybe with a Bigsby if I'm feeling flash.

5. A Rickie shaped guitar. I'd like a 620 shaped body with a Tele neck. Don't know why it just appeals. I quite fancy putting some Burns Trisonics on this too, for no other reason than I like the look of them and that, of course, they sound cool.

And that's it for now.

I do quite fancy doing a bass and a mandolin sometime too, but they are amorphous blobby thoughts at the limit of my vision, and will come into focus at a later date I expect.

A heh and a ho...

I Know It Is Bad Form...

A Rather Lovely Guitar
Seen earlier than now

I know I shouldn't be quite so lacking in humility.

It is a trait, and I'm not proud of being so,
well,
proud.

But I've been playing The Off Key One for the last hour

and with all due thingy

it is bloomin' lovely.

That is all.

Dreaming Of Joni

Well, bit of an odd day, as I may have mentioned, so I set to a thinking about The Joe Le Taxi One all proper-like.

From the top then, it is going to have a Telecaster/La Cabronita type of body. I'm going for the single pickup version as basically it looks better in my humblest d'opinion. The body is going to be made from Alder, which is all good and wholesome.

The neck, I've gone for a maple 'boarded lovely, with an aged lacquer feel to it. Into the holes I'm going for my fave aged Klusons. These are sort of rusty looking before you begin, and look fantastic on The Porn Shop One. (Don't want to think about The Porn Shop One right now *sniff*)

For the bridge, it will be a half-ashtray kinda thingy. I'm thinking one of the Gotoh ones, but will see what turns up, I guess.

For the pickup, I have acquired a lovely TV Jones Classic from that Simon geezer at Fusion, which is a sight for burning retinas. *sigh*

I should be past getting excited by such things, but I'm not, so there we are.

As for the finish, I'm in about four minds at the moment. I have to say that despite all the promises I've made (mainly to myself) I am vaguely tempted to do a bit of *cough* paisley, or at least fabric.

Although copper is grabbing me in a big way, and I have got some new gubbins I haven't tried yet that makes things sparkly which could be nice. (Not glitter, I tried that before once or twice.)

No matter, I'm sure I'll decide when I get there..

It's the journey, after all, tis the journey...

If it wasn't for Bad Luck...

Well, all excited I get up this morning ready to do a bit of Jookying after a few days of non-eventedness, and there I am.

Shiny new pickup for The Porn Shop One in hand.

Soldering iron nicely warmed up.

Everything looking cool and groovy and
      now I'm sitting comfortably,
            I begin.

Two minutes and it is all over.

(Why does that ring a bell?)

Not only have I managed to burn right thru the pickup connecting wire, but I've also turned the existing wiring in the lovely rusty body into a single glob of melted putridness.

How, you might ask?

Well, I took my eye off the ball - answered the fone and left the soldering iron, precariously sitting in it's stand, not for a moment imagining that it would topple over and into the guitar.

Which it did.

With hilarious consequences.

So, I start again.

At least the wood wasn't set alight, I guess.

So that was at 9.05am. Great start.

Needing a bit of therapy, I thought I'd polish some frets on a neck I've been practising on. So fretboard guard in place, wire wool in hand I begin.

First few frets look great, but the next one is clearly a bit on the sharp side as I realise when I see that the fretboard is developing a somewhat claret hue. And my finger is trickling blood all over it.

That was 9.30am.

Luckily I had a large Mr Bump plaster left.

No stitches required, I don't think.


Hot, sweet tea and a couple of crumpets later, I figure that maybe I'll leave those for today and do something completely different.

I got the lovely parquet Tele body for The Floored Genius One, and marked where I need to drill the holes in it.

That went OK.

Next I reached for my Ye Olde Handraulic Drill and...

Then I thought that maybe that wasn't a good idea either.

I'd probably kneecap meself.

Asking for trouble.

Instead then, by 10.30am the Jooky day is over and I'm going to go and visit a gallery or walk along the sea front or something.

Sometimes you just have to take the hint, don't you?

Calling For A Cab...

Well, another day and on the surface not a lot of stuff has happened, but beneath the surface, me little feet are going like the clappers.

I did get The Old Burny One a bit closer - it makes a noise now, which is cool, so jobs for the weekend are to do a bit of a tidy, string and set-up, which will be rather lovely. It was a dumb mistake, but I got there in the end.

Other than that, I moved The Drip Dry One a bit further forward - reamed/put on the tuners, de-gunked and oiled the neck so that it purrs, and wired it all up. Just need the bridge to arrive (one did but I'd measured it wrong so I've had to re-order - stoopid am we). So in truth, that is close too.

Parts, parts, always blinkin' parts, innit?

As for exciting new stuff, I've ordered meself a La Cabronita body to go with the TV Jones pickup and neck I've snaffled too. I've got a good idea how that one will look too, but more on that later, The Joe Le Taxi One.

As for my special offer, I'm going to let it run until Monday, I think, though maybe a stick-on Rolf beard isn't as appetising as gentrification, who can tell these days.

So over the weekend, given half a chance should be golden guitar time and see what the postie brings...

Golden Days

Waiting for the inspiration

Well, it has been a heavy 24 hours since The Off Key One got finished, and I have to say my fingers are sore. It is a beautiful thing to play and just looks dreamy, if rusty bronze is your thing.

Today though I'm going-a-bullet-biting and am intent on getting The Old Burny One to work, as it is irritating me like that fibre-glass lookalikey stuff you get in rose hips.

Waiting for some bits 'n' bobs

The silly thing is, I realised what was wrong - just a dodgy solder connection in the wrong place - about three weeks ago, and have managed to sidetrack myself consistently since.

In other news, I've quite fancied doing a Carbronita style thing for ages. Single TV Jones pickup and the rest, and as it happens young Simon at Fusion was flogging such a pickup.

Which is good, though that just means I need to find all of the other parts now, which is less so good.

I thought I'd found a nice Japanese Firebird to play with yesterday, but it turned-out to be more road-kill than road-worn, and I think beyond my meagre resurrectional abilities. Still, one day I expect, when I least suspect it...

In other news, I'm still awaiting parts for pretty much everything else, soo...these two pretties are still hanging around, bless 'em.

All of which means I'm back to putting right The Old Burny One.

Maybe I'll do it today after all...

Sold: The Off Key One

About The Off Key One

The Off Key One is a pure, vintage Rock machine. It has a handwound P90 pickup at the bridge and vintage correct wiring courtesy of the quite brilliant Fake58. The bronze top has been corroded using a ‘House Brew’ of various acids to give it a time-stained, blue/green patina. This in turn has been lacquered to keep it in one piece.

The pickup was handwound in Spain by Jess Loureiro, and features both Alnico 2 and 5 magnets to give both power and vintage warmth. This is a stunningly clear, yet raw pickup that really needs to be played to fully understand. Along with the wiring this can do everything from Jazz thru to Classic rock.

The body and fixed neck are mahogany, with tuners and wraparound bridge being made by Wilkinson and solid – no tuning/intonation issues to worry about here.

This is the second guitar to feature one of our “Pam’s Baywatch Bronze” finishes and with it’s matching headstock is quite stunning.

*

To be clear, The Off Key One is an utterly unique guitar, and there will never, ever, be another made. It is signed and numbered, entirely hand built and finished cooler than a slo-mo run across the pebbled beach at Portishead. There will genuinely never be another guitar like this and past experience suggests that it won’t be around for long.








Sorry, This Has Now SOLD

Technical Stuff:

Type: Pam’s Baywatch Bronze finish

Electrics: Jess Loureiro Dogear P90, Fake58 Vintage Wiring Loom, Bumble Bee Capacitor

Guitar Type: Gibson SG Junior

Construction: Mahogany body, Mahogany Fixed neck, Rosewood fretboard, corroded metallic paint.

Strings: Nickel 10s

Output: ¼” Guitar Lead

Controls: Single Volume, Fuzz Knob

Special Stuff: Certificate of Authenticity, Builder Signed and Numbered, All Wrapped with our Trademark Jooky Wrapping.

Serial Number: JGE#21

RSP: £699

Introducing: The Off Key One

Well, I'm-a-pleased to introduce you to that rarity, a Jooky guitar that has gone together easily and quickly without the usual levels of angst and tooth grinding,

*peel of drums
roll of trumpets*

...The Off Key One.

As the regular reader will notice, it is a lovely mahogany body and necked SG Junior type of delight, with a beautifully marked rosewood 'board.

The top of the body and indeed the front of the headstock have been gloriously smothered with an active bronze paint,  and then splattered with a 'House Special' mixture of acid to provoke a patination for the err, nation as though attacked with acid rain. This gives a rather nice greeny-blue rustiness that will wow your friends and amaze that bloke who goes thru your bins and peeps thru your curtains late at night.

As for the rest of it, well the tuners and wrapover bridge are Wilkinson - the tuners having a lovely worn bronze finish I couldn't resist, while the bridge is adjustable, so good for intonation and all that tuning stuff.

As for the wiring, well I've been a long time admirer of the vintage-esque parts Fake58 make/supply for restoring or recreating classic guitars, and despite this not being vintage on any level, I decided to go for one of their reproduction '50s wiring looms, one for a Les Paul Jr as it happens, but close enough.

This looks fantastic with it's Bumble Bee cap and top notch CTS pots, but more importantly sounds brilliant and clear and god forbid, the tone and volume controls actually work all the way down. Madness and unlikely to catch on.

Actually it didn't, did it?

Of course wiring and pots are nowt without a good pickup, and I must admit it was a bit of a leap of faith when I chose the Jess Loureiro handwound P90, seemingly on a whim, but I have to say it sounds absolutely gah and I'm feeling all inspired and vaguely smug.

I said at the time that Jess had recomended one Alnico 2 magnet alogside an Alnico 5 to give both warmth and power, and he was bang on the money. I've tried most every P90 available in recent times and most have cropped-up in Jookies along the way, but this is something special and dare I say it, maybe even better than the original.

A clever bloke once described a P90 as 'sex-in-your-face' and this is that and maybe a couple of Premiership footballers and their WAGS along for the ride too. You'll no doubt hear me talking about trying the rest of Jess' pickups at a later day, but if this is anything to go by the chap is a well kept secret for not much longer.

So there we are, I even remembered the Strap pins..it plays divine, and if you'll excuse me I'm going to plug-in, drop out and generally get a bit bloozy.

It may be a while before you hear anymore from me...

WIP: The Off Key One (Contains Content Nerd)

Bronzed McBronzed

Well, not a lot happening in Jookyland today, but I did edge closer toward finishing The Off Key One.

I know it is nerdy in extremes and it should be a way down the list, but what can I say - some of the parts showed-up and it would be rude not to try them.

Anyway, as you can see, I'm all mighty chuffed with the aged Bronze Wilkinson tuners, which fit perfectly and looks amazing. (I'll straighten them a bit when I put the screws in.)

The Fake58 wiring loom thingie also showed up, and I can't help keep looking at the bumble bee capacitor, and lovely tidy vintage wiring.

What you can't see is the Jess Loureiro Dogear P90, as I was out when they tried to deliver that (how quick does that man do it?) so I'll have to face up to the sorting office hell tomorrow instead.

Fake58 Wiring Loom - Wiring like it's 1958

In other news I gave The Grecian 201 One a spoodle, oiled the 'board and cleaned the frets, played with the action and put on new strings prior to it going off to Laird Brandon in his, well, castle somewhere, no doubt.

Tomorrow though, I'm going to do something proper as I'll be waiting for couriers and bored no doubt..

La la la

Waiting for a Dogeared Pickup.
Aren't we all?

In Summary...

Gone, soon to be, gone...

Well, The Grecian 201 One looks to have gone  to a nice chap called Laird Brandon, which means we're back to the more natural state of talking about things I haven't finished yet, rather than trying to sell the ones I have.

Which always hurts, it has to be said, so it is quite a relief for the cupboards to be baring-all once more.

The Porn Shop One remains untouched 'awaiting a Piledriver', and The Off Key One too needs a few extras that are being held hostage by postman across Europe.

I went for some aged bronze tuners in the end for that as they looked gorgeous and somehow fitting. Everything should be here next week anyway, so all is well. I really want to hear what Jess' P90 is like, my guilty secret. The one I talk about all the time.

As for the others, The Drip Dry One is my next focus, I think as I think it is going to be a really cool guitar, maybe stretching my Marmite principles even further than normal, but there we are. Though The Old Burny One, I keep forgetting my golden beauty, surely only needs a tweak.

But that is all for next week, methinks, for tonight we party like it is 2011.

My Sweet Laird: Join The Landed Gentry

Chance In A Lifetime Offer

In the latest of a long-old-line of reality-avoiding offers, here at The Jooky Guitar Emporium, I am pleased, or rather, proud to introduce an opportunity of a lifetime for one lucky personage.

But first, you need to ask yourself a few fundamental questions.

So, fundamentally...

Did you ever want to get a table at a posh nosh venue, but they always seemed full?

Do you ever look longingly at the chinless wonders who seem to believe being waived past the whiffy queues and upgraded to First Class on any flight is a right and not simply an undreamable dream?

Do you crave a title, something you can pass on to your kids?

Do you want to join the land owning gentry, with your own piece of Scotland?

Do you?

Well, do you?

I think you might.

So today, I am deeply proud to offer you that chance.

Today I am rather truly, madly and it has to be said, deeply inclined to invite you to become a Laird or Lady, along with your own piece of Scotland.

This is not a joke, totally legal and other than a bit silly, perfectly serious.

So for three days only, unless I get hit by a bus and this web page sticks around until another eternity is upon us and exists only on outmoded magnetic storage media, I am offering you the following chance of a lifetime.

The Grecian 201 One

1. You can buy the rather stunning The Grecian 201 One for £299 delivered with a Hardcase thingie. By clicking on the Big Yellow Button on this page. And rather beautiful it is too.

2. In addition to a rather splendid guitar, you will also become a Laird or Lady of Glencairn, as described below.

So, a great guitar and a golden invite to upgrade metropolis.

One guitar and Lairdship only, first-come-first-served etc.


Sorry, Tis Gone STC and all that...

***

More information about the Lairdship bobbins:

You will be sent an official personalised land ownership certificate along with a ‘Proof of Title’ card. This card allows you entry into the Lairds Retreat, 10 acres of beautiful land in Argyll, owned by South Angus Survival. The retreat is located by the banks of Loch Riddon which is viewed by many as one of Scotland’s most beautiful lochs. The Laird/Lady and their party are free to camp, hike and fish on the land - full details of the retreat are enclosed in the gift box.

A map showing the location of your plot is enclosed in your gift box. In order to preserve the natural state of the land there are no signs directing you to the plot neither are there any facilities on site. We suggest that you visit the Lairds Retreat rather that your plot.

So, forget Mr or Mrs – become a Laird or Lady!!

Inside the gift box:
•    Welcome letter
•    An explanation of the gift
•    A booklet about the Laird’s Retreat
•    Information on the history of Glencairn
•    A map of Glencairn
•    Presentation certificate
•    Presented in a luxury metal gift tin

After registration you will receive:
•    Land ownership certificate
•    Proof of title card

Gift details:
•    Upon registration your will own one square foot of land in Scotland
•    With that land ownership you will be entitled to use the Scottish title ‘Laird’ or the accepted female equivalent ‘Lady’.
•    Gain full, free access to the beautiful Laird’s Retreat in Scotland
•    The Laird’s Retreat is situated in Argyll and consists of 10 acres of hillside on the banks of Loch Riddon, one of Scotland’s most beautiful unspoilt lochs.
•    The estate benefits from a fresh water stream running to the loch and Lairds are free to fish, boat, hike or camp at the retreat.
•    Full details on how to become a Laird and further information about the Laird’s Retreat are enclosed inside the gift box.
•    Register your gift in one of two ways; either return the registration form enclosed in the box or go online to complete your registration.
•    Visit your plot; a map of Glencairn is enclosed.
•    After registration, receive a certificate confirming your land ownership and a proof of title card.
•    Pass your title down through generations.

FAQS:
Once registered, do I have to use the title?
No, you can still carry on using your original title. However you will be legally entitled to use the title Laird or Lady, at any time.

Can I call myself a Lord?
No, you cannot call yourself a Lord as this is a British aristocratic title.

Will I genuinely own the land?
Yes, once registered the land is legally yours.

Can my land and title be inherited?
Yes, as long as Scottish Highland Titles are informed of the changes then your title and land can be passed on.

Disclaimer: When registered, the recipient of this gift will own a square foot of land in Scotland. It is for this reason that they will become a Laird of the land. Although you will be the listed owner of this land you may not live on the land, make any improvements to, or develop your token plot and the deeds cannot be sold by the owner for a profit. The owner shall not receive any income or derive any other financial benefits whatsoever from their land. These are the official
titles that are given to land owners in Scotland and are the widely recognised Scottish equivalent of the English Lord or Lady title. The Laird title documents have been drawn up by Scottish lawyers to ensure that they are legal and valid documents, however neither Gift Republic Ltd nor its suppliers accept any liability for any defect in title caused or contributed to by the Scottish lawyers. Under no circumstances does this gift entitle the recipient to be an English Lord
or Lady. This is a novelty gift item and must be regarded as such.

WIP: The Porn Shop and Off Key Two

Well, a bit of a more productive day today...I found the camera if nothing else.

As you can see, The Off Key One is lacquered and just waiting for parts. The bluey-green corruption of the bronze top is lovely to behold in 3D and I'm really rather chuffed with myself.

The pickups and other parts will hopefully be here soonish, so Jr will be growing up before you know it.







As for the rather delish The Porn Shop One, that has turned into a bit of a pain.

Everything is together and screwed and generally fluffed within an inch of it's life. The bridge pickup sounds brilliant. Those Bare Knuckle chaps know their stuff and with the Cedar body it really sings.

With the neck pickup, I've had more of a troubling time. Hidden beneath the scratchplate that it is, it has proven tricky.

As we stand then, I'm still playing swap the pickup.

The old Gibson mini-humbucker, sadly is now but a memory as basically it couldn't cut it.

Since then I've tried a variety of other things and the best has been an overwound Bare Knuckle Boss neck pickup. However, I'm still not convinced and am therefore going to try a Bare Knuckle Piledriver (which is a bit more powerfilled), when that shows up next week.

I could just go with the Boss that is in there and to be honest if that proves to be the best, it sounds pretty-bloomin'-good anyway, but you are always looking for that extra 1% aren't you?

Plus without trying, it would feel like a bit of a cop out, so I won't.

No point it not being 100% after all.

I have also started to check out The Old Burny One, and will hopefully get a bit further with that later on. I'd almost forgotten about it, though not sure how as it is a pure delight.

Anyway...

Of Bumble Bees and other bobbins

A Bumble Bee Capacitor, and
No. I still can't find my camera

Well, no chance of doing much today, but I did sort out the parts for The Off Key One, and give it another dose of lacquery goodness.

So basically, it now will feature...

1. A mahogany body and neck

2. A Rosewood 'board

3. A Wilkinson, light Aluminium Wrapover bridge/tailpiece thing

4. Grover Rotaomatic Tuners

5. A Jess Loureiro handwound, custom made P90 Dogear pickup

6. A Fake 58 vintage authentic and rather fine looking wiring harness with an early Bumble Bee capacitor.

I even remembered the knobs and the strap pins for once.

I'll do some fotos when everything arrives.

Other than that, I still need  to finish the tweaking of The Porn Shop One and work out the problem with The Old Burny One.

This week, surely this week I will finish these thingies.

Of Porn and Dogears

A Random Dogear foto for illustrative purposes

Well, not a lot to show for it today as I can't find the camera, for one, but I did get some stuff done, if not quite finished.

The most frustrating one first - The Porn Shop One - well, I got the strings on, but have struggled a wee bit to balance the pickups. Individually they sound great, but together it isn't quite 'there' just yet.  I have to say I didn't have a clue what a Cedar body would sound like - but it really rings out, it has a lovely tone to it. The Bare Knuckle Boss pickup is nice and hot too, but again has that Tele clarity - I'm really rather pleased, has to be said.

Anyway, I've now taken the cover off the '70s Gibson mini humbucker, I'm going to call it Olive as it is easier to type. Well, I've taken the cover off of Olive and have raised it right to the scratchplate.

Hopefully now it will be more 'there' when I get some new strings on. If not, I'll probably go with something different with a bit more oomph. We'll see tomorrow. Other than that though, it is beautiful. Even if it is too big for the case (why didn't I think of that, I've had enough Jazzmasters).

Next, I got to give The Off Key One a good old fashioned lacquering. Another couple of coats tomorrow and we should be in business.

As for a pickup for that one, I've took a punt on a handwinding pickup maker called Jess Loureiro from Spain. Not somebody I'd heard of before - in fact I came across him on Ebay, searching for Dogears, and then checked him out. Anyway, he recomended a P90 with one magnet Alnico 2 and t'other Alnico 5. He says it will give a richer sound.

Now, odd though it seems I've never heard this idea before, but it makes sense. Alnico 5 is generally quite hotly warm and rock-like, whereas 2 is bluesier and more Jazz-tinted. So mixing them, well, it makes sense and it was good to get some advice.

Well, we'll soon find out as I've got one coming this way as it sounds perfect for The Off Key One. He also makes Jazzmaster pickups, which tempt me and sound brilliant on his demos.

Anyway, his web site is HERE and I'll let you know how it all goes. So far so good though, he seems a top fella to deal with and the demos of his pickups are excellent.

But that is for another day...

WIP: The Off Key One - I Wouldn't Let It Lie...

Step 1. Bronze Paint

Well, OK, I admit it. The real life other things got in the way of soldering or buying strings, so that will need to be tomorrow, but stuck at home, I had to do something, didn't I?

And The Off Key One was just sat there in the corner, giving me the eye...so what can you do?

I mean, I'm not proud of myself, but I just had to. I felt compelled.

I looked at her naked, stripped body and lost all sense of reason, and before I knew it I was smothering it with bronze paint.

Step 2. First lot of acid

Thick gloopiness dribbling all over.

What a mess, an unholy, god-neglecting mess. It was a beautifilled moment.

But I couldn't stand the shame, it just grabbed me, tortured me, so - and I'm not proud of myself - like many before, mortified by their lack of self controlingness, my lust, my innate urges turned to hatred and I threw acid on her, burned that lush bronzed skin that only moments before I had been feverishly pawing.



And then I did it again.

Step 3. More acid and a bit of drying...

And so now she sits, tortured, filled with self loathing, when it was never truly her fault

Off Key.

I still quite fancy her though...