Calling For A Cab...

Well, another day and on the surface not a lot of stuff has happened, but beneath the surface, me little feet are going like the clappers.

I did get The Old Burny One a bit closer - it makes a noise now, which is cool, so jobs for the weekend are to do a bit of a tidy, string and set-up, which will be rather lovely. It was a dumb mistake, but I got there in the end.

Other than that, I moved The Drip Dry One a bit further forward - reamed/put on the tuners, de-gunked and oiled the neck so that it purrs, and wired it all up. Just need the bridge to arrive (one did but I'd measured it wrong so I've had to re-order - stoopid am we). So in truth, that is close too.

Parts, parts, always blinkin' parts, innit?

As for exciting new stuff, I've ordered meself a La Cabronita body to go with the TV Jones pickup and neck I've snaffled too. I've got a good idea how that one will look too, but more on that later, The Joe Le Taxi One.

As for my special offer, I'm going to let it run until Monday, I think, though maybe a stick-on Rolf beard isn't as appetising as gentrification, who can tell these days.

So over the weekend, given half a chance should be golden guitar time and see what the postie brings...

Golden Days

Waiting for the inspiration

Well, it has been a heavy 24 hours since The Off Key One got finished, and I have to say my fingers are sore. It is a beautiful thing to play and just looks dreamy, if rusty bronze is your thing.

Today though I'm going-a-bullet-biting and am intent on getting The Old Burny One to work, as it is irritating me like that fibre-glass lookalikey stuff you get in rose hips.

Waiting for some bits 'n' bobs

The silly thing is, I realised what was wrong - just a dodgy solder connection in the wrong place - about three weeks ago, and have managed to sidetrack myself consistently since.

In other news, I've quite fancied doing a Carbronita style thing for ages. Single TV Jones pickup and the rest, and as it happens young Simon at Fusion was flogging such a pickup.

Which is good, though that just means I need to find all of the other parts now, which is less so good.

I thought I'd found a nice Japanese Firebird to play with yesterday, but it turned-out to be more road-kill than road-worn, and I think beyond my meagre resurrectional abilities. Still, one day I expect, when I least suspect it...

In other news, I'm still awaiting parts for pretty much everything else, soo...these two pretties are still hanging around, bless 'em.

All of which means I'm back to putting right The Old Burny One.

Maybe I'll do it today after all...

Sold: The Off Key One

About The Off Key One

The Off Key One is a pure, vintage Rock machine. It has a handwound P90 pickup at the bridge and vintage correct wiring courtesy of the quite brilliant Fake58. The bronze top has been corroded using a ‘House Brew’ of various acids to give it a time-stained, blue/green patina. This in turn has been lacquered to keep it in one piece.

The pickup was handwound in Spain by Jess Loureiro, and features both Alnico 2 and 5 magnets to give both power and vintage warmth. This is a stunningly clear, yet raw pickup that really needs to be played to fully understand. Along with the wiring this can do everything from Jazz thru to Classic rock.

The body and fixed neck are mahogany, with tuners and wraparound bridge being made by Wilkinson and solid – no tuning/intonation issues to worry about here.

This is the second guitar to feature one of our “Pam’s Baywatch Bronze” finishes and with it’s matching headstock is quite stunning.

*

To be clear, The Off Key One is an utterly unique guitar, and there will never, ever, be another made. It is signed and numbered, entirely hand built and finished cooler than a slo-mo run across the pebbled beach at Portishead. There will genuinely never be another guitar like this and past experience suggests that it won’t be around for long.








Sorry, This Has Now SOLD

Technical Stuff:

Type: Pam’s Baywatch Bronze finish

Electrics: Jess Loureiro Dogear P90, Fake58 Vintage Wiring Loom, Bumble Bee Capacitor

Guitar Type: Gibson SG Junior

Construction: Mahogany body, Mahogany Fixed neck, Rosewood fretboard, corroded metallic paint.

Strings: Nickel 10s

Output: ¼” Guitar Lead

Controls: Single Volume, Fuzz Knob

Special Stuff: Certificate of Authenticity, Builder Signed and Numbered, All Wrapped with our Trademark Jooky Wrapping.

Serial Number: JGE#21

RSP: £699

Introducing: The Off Key One

Well, I'm-a-pleased to introduce you to that rarity, a Jooky guitar that has gone together easily and quickly without the usual levels of angst and tooth grinding,

*peel of drums
roll of trumpets*

...The Off Key One.

As the regular reader will notice, it is a lovely mahogany body and necked SG Junior type of delight, with a beautifully marked rosewood 'board.

The top of the body and indeed the front of the headstock have been gloriously smothered with an active bronze paint,  and then splattered with a 'House Special' mixture of acid to provoke a patination for the err, nation as though attacked with acid rain. This gives a rather nice greeny-blue rustiness that will wow your friends and amaze that bloke who goes thru your bins and peeps thru your curtains late at night.

As for the rest of it, well the tuners and wrapover bridge are Wilkinson - the tuners having a lovely worn bronze finish I couldn't resist, while the bridge is adjustable, so good for intonation and all that tuning stuff.

As for the wiring, well I've been a long time admirer of the vintage-esque parts Fake58 make/supply for restoring or recreating classic guitars, and despite this not being vintage on any level, I decided to go for one of their reproduction '50s wiring looms, one for a Les Paul Jr as it happens, but close enough.

This looks fantastic with it's Bumble Bee cap and top notch CTS pots, but more importantly sounds brilliant and clear and god forbid, the tone and volume controls actually work all the way down. Madness and unlikely to catch on.

Actually it didn't, did it?

Of course wiring and pots are nowt without a good pickup, and I must admit it was a bit of a leap of faith when I chose the Jess Loureiro handwound P90, seemingly on a whim, but I have to say it sounds absolutely gah and I'm feeling all inspired and vaguely smug.

I said at the time that Jess had recomended one Alnico 2 magnet alogside an Alnico 5 to give both warmth and power, and he was bang on the money. I've tried most every P90 available in recent times and most have cropped-up in Jookies along the way, but this is something special and dare I say it, maybe even better than the original.

A clever bloke once described a P90 as 'sex-in-your-face' and this is that and maybe a couple of Premiership footballers and their WAGS along for the ride too. You'll no doubt hear me talking about trying the rest of Jess' pickups at a later day, but if this is anything to go by the chap is a well kept secret for not much longer.

So there we are, I even remembered the Strap pins..it plays divine, and if you'll excuse me I'm going to plug-in, drop out and generally get a bit bloozy.

It may be a while before you hear anymore from me...

WIP: The Off Key One (Contains Content Nerd)

Bronzed McBronzed

Well, not a lot happening in Jookyland today, but I did edge closer toward finishing The Off Key One.

I know it is nerdy in extremes and it should be a way down the list, but what can I say - some of the parts showed-up and it would be rude not to try them.

Anyway, as you can see, I'm all mighty chuffed with the aged Bronze Wilkinson tuners, which fit perfectly and looks amazing. (I'll straighten them a bit when I put the screws in.)

The Fake58 wiring loom thingie also showed up, and I can't help keep looking at the bumble bee capacitor, and lovely tidy vintage wiring.

What you can't see is the Jess Loureiro Dogear P90, as I was out when they tried to deliver that (how quick does that man do it?) so I'll have to face up to the sorting office hell tomorrow instead.

Fake58 Wiring Loom - Wiring like it's 1958

In other news I gave The Grecian 201 One a spoodle, oiled the 'board and cleaned the frets, played with the action and put on new strings prior to it going off to Laird Brandon in his, well, castle somewhere, no doubt.

Tomorrow though, I'm going to do something proper as I'll be waiting for couriers and bored no doubt..

La la la

Waiting for a Dogeared Pickup.
Aren't we all?

In Summary...

Gone, soon to be, gone...

Well, The Grecian 201 One looks to have gone  to a nice chap called Laird Brandon, which means we're back to the more natural state of talking about things I haven't finished yet, rather than trying to sell the ones I have.

Which always hurts, it has to be said, so it is quite a relief for the cupboards to be baring-all once more.

The Porn Shop One remains untouched 'awaiting a Piledriver', and The Off Key One too needs a few extras that are being held hostage by postman across Europe.

I went for some aged bronze tuners in the end for that as they looked gorgeous and somehow fitting. Everything should be here next week anyway, so all is well. I really want to hear what Jess' P90 is like, my guilty secret. The one I talk about all the time.

As for the others, The Drip Dry One is my next focus, I think as I think it is going to be a really cool guitar, maybe stretching my Marmite principles even further than normal, but there we are. Though The Old Burny One, I keep forgetting my golden beauty, surely only needs a tweak.

But that is all for next week, methinks, for tonight we party like it is 2011.

My Sweet Laird: Join The Landed Gentry

Chance In A Lifetime Offer

In the latest of a long-old-line of reality-avoiding offers, here at The Jooky Guitar Emporium, I am pleased, or rather, proud to introduce an opportunity of a lifetime for one lucky personage.

But first, you need to ask yourself a few fundamental questions.

So, fundamentally...

Did you ever want to get a table at a posh nosh venue, but they always seemed full?

Do you ever look longingly at the chinless wonders who seem to believe being waived past the whiffy queues and upgraded to First Class on any flight is a right and not simply an undreamable dream?

Do you crave a title, something you can pass on to your kids?

Do you want to join the land owning gentry, with your own piece of Scotland?

Do you?

Well, do you?

I think you might.

So today, I am deeply proud to offer you that chance.

Today I am rather truly, madly and it has to be said, deeply inclined to invite you to become a Laird or Lady, along with your own piece of Scotland.

This is not a joke, totally legal and other than a bit silly, perfectly serious.

So for three days only, unless I get hit by a bus and this web page sticks around until another eternity is upon us and exists only on outmoded magnetic storage media, I am offering you the following chance of a lifetime.

The Grecian 201 One

1. You can buy the rather stunning The Grecian 201 One for £299 delivered with a Hardcase thingie. By clicking on the Big Yellow Button on this page. And rather beautiful it is too.

2. In addition to a rather splendid guitar, you will also become a Laird or Lady of Glencairn, as described below.

So, a great guitar and a golden invite to upgrade metropolis.

One guitar and Lairdship only, first-come-first-served etc.


Sorry, Tis Gone STC and all that...

***

More information about the Lairdship bobbins:

You will be sent an official personalised land ownership certificate along with a ‘Proof of Title’ card. This card allows you entry into the Lairds Retreat, 10 acres of beautiful land in Argyll, owned by South Angus Survival. The retreat is located by the banks of Loch Riddon which is viewed by many as one of Scotland’s most beautiful lochs. The Laird/Lady and their party are free to camp, hike and fish on the land - full details of the retreat are enclosed in the gift box.

A map showing the location of your plot is enclosed in your gift box. In order to preserve the natural state of the land there are no signs directing you to the plot neither are there any facilities on site. We suggest that you visit the Lairds Retreat rather that your plot.

So, forget Mr or Mrs – become a Laird or Lady!!

Inside the gift box:
•    Welcome letter
•    An explanation of the gift
•    A booklet about the Laird’s Retreat
•    Information on the history of Glencairn
•    A map of Glencairn
•    Presentation certificate
•    Presented in a luxury metal gift tin

After registration you will receive:
•    Land ownership certificate
•    Proof of title card

Gift details:
•    Upon registration your will own one square foot of land in Scotland
•    With that land ownership you will be entitled to use the Scottish title ‘Laird’ or the accepted female equivalent ‘Lady’.
•    Gain full, free access to the beautiful Laird’s Retreat in Scotland
•    The Laird’s Retreat is situated in Argyll and consists of 10 acres of hillside on the banks of Loch Riddon, one of Scotland’s most beautiful unspoilt lochs.
•    The estate benefits from a fresh water stream running to the loch and Lairds are free to fish, boat, hike or camp at the retreat.
•    Full details on how to become a Laird and further information about the Laird’s Retreat are enclosed inside the gift box.
•    Register your gift in one of two ways; either return the registration form enclosed in the box or go online to complete your registration.
•    Visit your plot; a map of Glencairn is enclosed.
•    After registration, receive a certificate confirming your land ownership and a proof of title card.
•    Pass your title down through generations.

FAQS:
Once registered, do I have to use the title?
No, you can still carry on using your original title. However you will be legally entitled to use the title Laird or Lady, at any time.

Can I call myself a Lord?
No, you cannot call yourself a Lord as this is a British aristocratic title.

Will I genuinely own the land?
Yes, once registered the land is legally yours.

Can my land and title be inherited?
Yes, as long as Scottish Highland Titles are informed of the changes then your title and land can be passed on.

Disclaimer: When registered, the recipient of this gift will own a square foot of land in Scotland. It is for this reason that they will become a Laird of the land. Although you will be the listed owner of this land you may not live on the land, make any improvements to, or develop your token plot and the deeds cannot be sold by the owner for a profit. The owner shall not receive any income or derive any other financial benefits whatsoever from their land. These are the official
titles that are given to land owners in Scotland and are the widely recognised Scottish equivalent of the English Lord or Lady title. The Laird title documents have been drawn up by Scottish lawyers to ensure that they are legal and valid documents, however neither Gift Republic Ltd nor its suppliers accept any liability for any defect in title caused or contributed to by the Scottish lawyers. Under no circumstances does this gift entitle the recipient to be an English Lord
or Lady. This is a novelty gift item and must be regarded as such.

WIP: The Porn Shop and Off Key Two

Well, a bit of a more productive day today...I found the camera if nothing else.

As you can see, The Off Key One is lacquered and just waiting for parts. The bluey-green corruption of the bronze top is lovely to behold in 3D and I'm really rather chuffed with myself.

The pickups and other parts will hopefully be here soonish, so Jr will be growing up before you know it.







As for the rather delish The Porn Shop One, that has turned into a bit of a pain.

Everything is together and screwed and generally fluffed within an inch of it's life. The bridge pickup sounds brilliant. Those Bare Knuckle chaps know their stuff and with the Cedar body it really sings.

With the neck pickup, I've had more of a troubling time. Hidden beneath the scratchplate that it is, it has proven tricky.

As we stand then, I'm still playing swap the pickup.

The old Gibson mini-humbucker, sadly is now but a memory as basically it couldn't cut it.

Since then I've tried a variety of other things and the best has been an overwound Bare Knuckle Boss neck pickup. However, I'm still not convinced and am therefore going to try a Bare Knuckle Piledriver (which is a bit more powerfilled), when that shows up next week.

I could just go with the Boss that is in there and to be honest if that proves to be the best, it sounds pretty-bloomin'-good anyway, but you are always looking for that extra 1% aren't you?

Plus without trying, it would feel like a bit of a cop out, so I won't.

No point it not being 100% after all.

I have also started to check out The Old Burny One, and will hopefully get a bit further with that later on. I'd almost forgotten about it, though not sure how as it is a pure delight.

Anyway...

Of Bumble Bees and other bobbins

A Bumble Bee Capacitor, and
No. I still can't find my camera

Well, no chance of doing much today, but I did sort out the parts for The Off Key One, and give it another dose of lacquery goodness.

So basically, it now will feature...

1. A mahogany body and neck

2. A Rosewood 'board

3. A Wilkinson, light Aluminium Wrapover bridge/tailpiece thing

4. Grover Rotaomatic Tuners

5. A Jess Loureiro handwound, custom made P90 Dogear pickup

6. A Fake 58 vintage authentic and rather fine looking wiring harness with an early Bumble Bee capacitor.

I even remembered the knobs and the strap pins for once.

I'll do some fotos when everything arrives.

Other than that, I still need  to finish the tweaking of The Porn Shop One and work out the problem with The Old Burny One.

This week, surely this week I will finish these thingies.

Of Porn and Dogears

A Random Dogear foto for illustrative purposes

Well, not a lot to show for it today as I can't find the camera, for one, but I did get some stuff done, if not quite finished.

The most frustrating one first - The Porn Shop One - well, I got the strings on, but have struggled a wee bit to balance the pickups. Individually they sound great, but together it isn't quite 'there' just yet.  I have to say I didn't have a clue what a Cedar body would sound like - but it really rings out, it has a lovely tone to it. The Bare Knuckle Boss pickup is nice and hot too, but again has that Tele clarity - I'm really rather pleased, has to be said.

Anyway, I've now taken the cover off the '70s Gibson mini humbucker, I'm going to call it Olive as it is easier to type. Well, I've taken the cover off of Olive and have raised it right to the scratchplate.

Hopefully now it will be more 'there' when I get some new strings on. If not, I'll probably go with something different with a bit more oomph. We'll see tomorrow. Other than that though, it is beautiful. Even if it is too big for the case (why didn't I think of that, I've had enough Jazzmasters).

Next, I got to give The Off Key One a good old fashioned lacquering. Another couple of coats tomorrow and we should be in business.

As for a pickup for that one, I've took a punt on a handwinding pickup maker called Jess Loureiro from Spain. Not somebody I'd heard of before - in fact I came across him on Ebay, searching for Dogears, and then checked him out. Anyway, he recomended a P90 with one magnet Alnico 2 and t'other Alnico 5. He says it will give a richer sound.

Now, odd though it seems I've never heard this idea before, but it makes sense. Alnico 5 is generally quite hotly warm and rock-like, whereas 2 is bluesier and more Jazz-tinted. So mixing them, well, it makes sense and it was good to get some advice.

Well, we'll soon find out as I've got one coming this way as it sounds perfect for The Off Key One. He also makes Jazzmaster pickups, which tempt me and sound brilliant on his demos.

Anyway, his web site is HERE and I'll let you know how it all goes. So far so good though, he seems a top fella to deal with and the demos of his pickups are excellent.

But that is for another day...

WIP: The Off Key One - I Wouldn't Let It Lie...

Step 1. Bronze Paint

Well, OK, I admit it. The real life other things got in the way of soldering or buying strings, so that will need to be tomorrow, but stuck at home, I had to do something, didn't I?

And The Off Key One was just sat there in the corner, giving me the eye...so what can you do?

I mean, I'm not proud of myself, but I just had to. I felt compelled.

I looked at her naked, stripped body and lost all sense of reason, and before I knew it I was smothering it with bronze paint.

Step 2. First lot of acid

Thick gloopiness dribbling all over.

What a mess, an unholy, god-neglecting mess. It was a beautifilled moment.

But I couldn't stand the shame, it just grabbed me, tortured me, so - and I'm not proud of myself - like many before, mortified by their lack of self controlingness, my lust, my innate urges turned to hatred and I threw acid on her, burned that lush bronzed skin that only moments before I had been feverishly pawing.



And then I did it again.

Step 3. More acid and a bit of drying...

And so now she sits, tortured, filled with self loathing, when it was never truly her fault

Off Key.

I still quite fancy her though...

I'm a Juggling Boy

Well, another week in purdor beckons, as I find myself surrounded by nearly-finished guitars, twirling in a holding pattern around my head like fluttery bats. So where to start?

Well, I need to get some strings - how can I have run out of strings? - so I can finish The Porn Shop One. Other than that and a set-up it is (hopefully) complete, so that should be a win, methinks.

After that is of course a bit of a why-the-f&*k-isn't-it-working session with The Old Burny One. I had it figured out last week, but should have written it down somewhere as I can't remember what my figuring led to right now.

The Tripadelic One is off to a new owner, which means we're down to just one guitar for sale again - The Grecian 201 One - which surprises me somewhat as I think it is amazing. And of course if I play a Jooky guitar and start to think 'Maybe, just maybe I could stretch the golden rules and keep this one'....they normally sell before I complete the thought sentence thing.

Still, I can play it today, which is OK by me.

Other than that, I'm ignoring The Drip Dry and Bye Bye Buy Ones until the other two are out of the way.

Just to throw a spanner in the works, the SG Jr I was talking about last week - The Off Key One - just arrived and it is beautiful. As you can see somebody has started to sand it down, but it is a lovely piece of mahogany and the neck is really nice-in-the-hand, as it were. Looking forward to doing this, but maybe not just yet. Not least because I need to get, well, all the parts, and decide whether to go golden or bronze.

Anyway....

WIP: The Porn Shop One

Well, I never got anywhere near a soldering iron, but I did manage to get a chop on with the Porn Shop One.

As you can see, the rusted iron finish is just amazing, and everything is screwed together.

Just some soldering alchemy to do to make it noisy and it will be there.

Though there are a few in that boat around here, it has to be said..

Here it be anywaysup

 

Whole Lotta Rustin' Goin' On

The Back All Sealed And Moody

Well, Day two of The Porn Shop One's Jookification and it is a bit more ironing.

First up though, I had to seal the rustiness on the back of the guitar. This dampens the colour down somewhat making it richer and more woody, which I like, while retaining a degree of orangeyfireyness which I love. It gets brighter again once it is lacquered though and all a bit 3D, which is rather compelling.

Anyway, that is all good and as the sealer stuff dried overnight I've moved on to the front. I decided I might as well lacquer the body as one later, as the sealer is good enough to keep things stable while I do the front.

Least, I think it is.

In addition to the guitar front, after much searching-for-a-soul, I decided to go for a matching headstock, so that is being ironed then rusted today too. I was in two minds really, but the neck looked so clean compared to the body - maple 'board and all that - that it seemed to make sense. I'm also doing the scratchplate in rusty goodness while I'm at it. Me and Henry Ford - can't be bad.

So as far as The Porn Shop One goes, the body should be complete next week sometime, I would think, depending on how much lacquer I use and how quickly it dries.

As for the others, well, kids back at school tomorrow for a day so I'll be moving on with some soldering with a bit of luck and getting The Old Burny One fettled. I can't wait to hear what that sounds like. Especially with a weekend ahead to play it

As for the others, well, it will be next week before I get them done I expect now, but it is all coming together.

As for the SG Jr thing, I've decided on the spec - it will have:

1. Mahogany body
2. Mahogany fixed neck
3. Rosewood 'board
4. '50s style wiring - all bumble bees and braided wiring
5. Gotoh Wraparound bridge
6. Grover tuners
7. Bare Knuckle P90 Dogear
8. A 24 karat Gold Leaf top, suitably roughed-up.

And henceforth it shall be known locally as The Off Key One, as it has an offset SG body. Bless it.

Gloopified Frontage

Minor Rustification

More Rustifying Before Your Eyes

There's a Scratchplate In There So There Is

On Me Head Son